Plan B

Leaving the hospital in November, Plan A involved waiting patiently for my heart to make a full recovery. But there comes a time when you have to fish or cut bait. Being someone with a bias for action in general, the waiting game has not been my idea of a good time. It has now been six months since I was first hospitalized, which is said to be the magic time period during which my heart would either recover or not. It seems the latter is my new reality. Since my stubborn heart has not even shown marginal improvement, it’s time to cut bait and pursue Plan B, a heart transplant.

Back in November, when the doctors first recommended I be listed for transplant, I believed it was unlikely I’d end up needing one, partly because I still didn’t truly appreciate the magnitude of my illness and partly out of sheer hope. So I listened half-heartedly as everyone from the transplant coordinator and the nutritionist to the social worker, pharmacist and even a dentist visited my room to arm me with all the information one could ever want about a heart transplant. I accepted the literature and signed the papers, knowing that with each stroke of the pen, my discharge from the hospital and the prospect of sleeping in my own bed became closer to a reality.

Flash forward five months, and here we are. On April 30, my doctors will relax the restrictions under which I’m currently listed in order to find a match for me as soon as possible thereafter. The bad news is I’m terrified, the wait continues and the next year of my life will likely be less than ideal. The good news is abundant. I have amazing parents who are incredibly supportive. The prognosis for someone of my age and in otherwise good health is excellent. Before long, I will be able to run, ski, swim, travel and otherwise enjoy myself again. I will be able to work again, without the burden of IV medication and fatigue. I have fantastic doctors and nurses whom I trust completely. I’ll have the transplant surgery less than a mile from my apartment. And best of all for my anxious mind, we have a real plan.

While Plan B still involves a wait of indeterminate length, there is a beautiful reward at the end. And though the reward will take some time to be fully realized, since recovery from heart transplantation is not immediate, I know it will be so worthwhile. So, I accept Plan B with open arms and cautious optimism and request two things from you: 1 – please think positive thoughts as my surgery draws nearer every day and 2 – please consider becoming an organ donor. Today, there are over 106,000 people awaiting life-saving organ transplants.